its getting close to end of term 1..so far 8 weeks plus had passed..and you know what..my life's in a mess..just couldnt believe it..8 weeks into 2005 and i am faced with mess..

its only the start of a new year..and i am feeling burnt out..why..its so freaking fast..felt so tired everyday..just yearning to have more sleep everyday..since the start of the year..talking about proper rest for my brain..thats bullshit..thanks to the 5 day work week..my week for me had become a 7 day work week..5 days in school..sat and sunday to finish up 1 week's homework and do some revision on what had been taught so far(to say its read on my own and understand what lectures are teaching now,its too fast for my liking.) this year isnt like last year..what happened..no actually its the same..i just burn out too quickly..and i hope for the hols to come, den i can sleep the full day..24 hrs sleep..that will be good rest for my brain..and hols..revisions for me..especially my maths and econs..maths for now i still can do..but last year's stuff..its hopeless..econs..i dun realli understand how to read and answer the DRQ/case study..see them will stone..oh no..i better get my hands on the stupid tys..hope its guides are useful..

and studies aside..my love life been in a total mess too..maybe love isnt the word to use since i not been on a relationship before..well..end of last year was one mess which drag on to this year..luckily its been cleared up..and now everything is perfectly fine between the both of us..well before the mess totally subsided..i created another mess for myself..i fell for someone..real shocking to me..because i din expect things to go so fast..nvr mind that..its the same case all over..its another one sided love..so things went fast and end pretty fast..things aint the same again..and why..because the root of the problem had not been solved..just felt that i expected more from it..budden..its always like that..everytime such a thing happen..the people involved seems to be not on talking terms anymore..why?a decision was made..den everything should be fine again..just take it as nothing had happen..coool for both parties right..you wish..there is always something that always linger behind after such things happen..and this sumthing will just stay and not go away..the silence between the both of us is now so hurting..does this signal the end of our "yuan fen"?i really wish i can read ppl's mind..and i hate myself now..why am i still hanging on and refusing to let go..damn..